Here we go! Dave and Jeff discuss the finer points of Chapter 2: Roast Mutton!
[16:06] Dave: So you finished Roast Mutton?
[16:06] Jeff S: I have!
[16:07] Jeff S: Those poor trolls!
[16:07] Jeff S: there they are, just livin' their life... and along come these dwarves, Hobbit and magician, and kill them.
[16:08] Dave: Well, they were going to EAT them!
[16:08] Jeff S: OH! I remembered what I was going to say about chapter 1!
[16:08] Jeff S: (it applies to chapter 2)
[16:08] Jeff S: So... Gandalf. He is a wizard.
[16:08] Jeff S: because he SAYS SO?!
[16:08] Dave: ac
[16:08] Jeff S: OOOOH! He showed off his "ventriliquism spell"?!
[16:08] Jeff S: using his "magic" to make the trolls think someone else is talking?
[16:09] Jeff S: honestly, if this were my first dance with Gandalf, I'd be really dubious that he wasn't just a con-artist.
[16:09] Jeff S: er... yeah, I'm magic. Look, I've..um... made a SMOKE RING!
[16:10] Dave: You should see what he can do in the bedroom.
[16:10] Dave: Why do Gandalf sex jokes spring so easily to mind?!
[16:10] Jeff S: the answer to that is deep within your psyche, I fear.
[16:12] Dave: I'd love to go deeeep into Gandalf's psyche if you know what I mean! (???)
[16:12] Jeff S: well... I shall continue to keep my eye on Gandalf, and make note of when he first exhibits some REAL magical tallent "on screen", as it were.
[16:12] Dave: Yeah… not too often really.
[16:12] Jeff S: Mind, we are already through chapter 2.
[16:12] Jeff S: and I know you don't want to lead with "big magic" or anything... but shouldn't there have been something by now?
[16:12] Jeff S: I can't be the first to feel like it's a put-on, right?
[16:12] Dave: Magic in Tolkien's world is very…conservative.
[16:13] Jeff S: aaaaaah! so it wants all hobbits to register themselves...
[16:13] Jeff S: conservative magic!
[16:14] Jeff S: We made Obama's birth certificate disappear! Conservative Magic!
[16:15] Jeff S: Watch as we Cut up ... and then not restore the Bill Of Rights! CONSERVATIVE MAGIC!
[16:15] Jeff S: no?
[16:15] Jeff S: not gonna make it to "meme" status?
[16:15] Jeff S: hashtag conservativemagic
[16:15] Dave: Hmmm…Gandalf is a raging islamaphobe?
[16:16] Dave: #conservativemagic
[16:16] Jeff S: Bilbo waterboards gollum for information on the ring.
[16:17] Dave: The gates of minas morgul are so high, they keep all the illegal immigrants out. #conservative magic
[16:17] Jeff S: But who's going to build them?! The Orcs, of course!
[16:17] Jeff S: #ConservativeMagicIrony
[16:19] Dave: I do think the orcs were a bit…um…questionable in the movie.
[16:19] Jeff S: seriously! how did so many get into Middle Earth, in the first place?!
[16:19] Dave: Ah! Well, I know the answer to that.
[16:19] Dave: They were made.
[16:20] Jeff S: way to torpedo a great gag.
[16:20] Jeff S: with your FACTS!
[16:20] Dave: oh...
[16:20] Dave: continue please.
[16:20] Jeff S: nah, I ran out of steam on it...
[16:20] Dave: ...
[16:20] Dave: They were made by Melkor, Sauron's master, as an answer to the Elves...
[16:20] Jeff S: so... Chapter 1: Mutton or whatever
[16:21] Dave: huh?
[16:21] Jeff S: hmmm
[16:21] Dave: Chapter 2: Roast Mutton
[16:21] Jeff S: so, you're saying that it's ok to kill something, even if it was just being itself, as was it's nature?
[16:22] Jeff S: the Trolls were what they are. could they help it if they were given a taste for man as food?!
[16:22] Jeff S: I'm totally going Hermione on this one and saying we should support the trolls!
[16:22] Dave: whoa
[16:22] Dave: Troll rights!
[16:23] Jeff S: and JRR says it's ok that they die, because they were stupid and mean.
[16:23] Dave: Well…they were murderous.
[16:23] Jeff S: well, so was the kid who bullied me in Jr. High, but I don't wish that good-for-nothing, piece of crap [name redacted] DEATH!
[16:23] Dave: yeah.
[16:23] Jeff S: YEAH!
[16:23] Dave: YEAH!
[16:23] Dave: Though...
[16:24] Dave: I believe this one guy who bullied me in middle school actually DID die...
[16:24] Dave: :(
[16:24] Jeff S: whoa.
[16:24] Jeff S: sh%t just got real
[16:24] Dave: Well, I'm exhausted now.
[16:25] Jeff S: Are the Dawrves and Bilbo and Gandalf REALLY any better than the Trolls, if you think of it?
[16:25] Jeff S: murderers, all
[16:26] Dave: Aren't we all just murderers in the end? (???)
[16:27] Jeff S: Not if they don't find the knives!
[16:27] Dave: I assume this is all going up on the blog?
[16:28] Jeff S: possibly.
[16:28] Dave: hahaha
[16:28] Jeff S: if I get around to it!
[16:28] Dave: That's the spirit!
[16:28] Jeff S: There is more to say, but this chat is running a bit long. So let's end it here.
[16:29] Jeff S: We'll be back with more "The Hobbit" book club, later in the week, when we discuss Chapter 3!
